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Tasty Remotes

My big college brother came home. Well, he didn’t know that he was supposed to hide the remotes. I just couldn’t help it. Then, my momma came home.
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A Special Birthday Howl!

A wonderful reader named Ella let me in on a secret that it was her mom’s birthday today and that Velcro and Spider would like to wish her a happy birthday! They promise to be good*.
*limited time offer.
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Mom’s Personal Assistant

What! I like to get into Mom’s packages!
-Hazel
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Doggy Daycare Dropout

I have officially been kicked out of doggy daycare, twice!
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Stuffed Crust Pupperoni Pizza

I pulled a pizza off the table & horked down 6 slices of stuffed crust and pepperoni.
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Bad Olive

She was a funny one!
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But I

I dropped the pill pocket containing three heart medications for my Cocker Spaniel and my 7lb Morkie snatched it up at gobbled it down.
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Jealous cats

I got jealous that all the dogs had their pictures on the calendar and decided to rip it apart. Have you picked up your 2021 calendars yet? You can do so through many online retailers or brick and mortar stores. Here’s the link to them on amazon!
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Pandemic Fail!

She loves toilet paper and doesn’t care if it is in short supply.
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I Love Lamp

We have a tall lamp in the den. She does not like it, apparently.
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Punishment Reduction Due to Extreme Cuteness

New Record!! Biggest mess made while destroying my bed!
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I don’t Give a Sheet

I’m only allowed on the sheet.
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Pillow Talk

When I have to fart I ALWAYS run and sit on mamas pillow before letting it rip! Sharing is caring after all!
Sorry not sorry!
Sincerely,
Winston the Shih Tzu
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Baxter, the Phantom Peeper

Baxter is a Dachshund/Basset rescue dog. He is a perfect angel during the day, but refuses to go outside in the middle of the night to relieve himself. If not restricted, he will choose a leather chair in the living room, ceramic vase on the floor, or anything that he can access to lift his leg upon!
Have you picked up your copy of the 2021 dogshaming calendar? NO? That’s a shame. Get it? Because dogshaming…
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This one Passed the “Screen Test”

Guess who peed through screen?
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Jobless > Engineer (according to the dog)

“I didn’t want my daddy to pass the P.E. exam”
So my 2 yr old lab, Noah, tore up my practice exam book, calculator, and pencil so I wouldn’t pass the professional engineering exam, then become a jobless bum, and have to stay home with him instead!
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Doing Their Part for the Environment!

I like to take things I’m not supposed to and eat them, including items from the recycle bag.
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Sh*t Happens

Risa had diarrhea one day while we were at work. She felt very bad about it.
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Mommy’s Diamond is Safe…for now.

So I come home from work yesterday and noticed one of my diamond earrings, that I forgot to remove from coffee table, was missing. I found the back to it in one of my furbabies beds, chewed flat. I didn’t know which one did it so they both had to have an X-ray this morning to find out who the culprit was. Unfortunately I chose the wrong one to have X-ray first so I ended up paying for two of them. Needless to say, I know my diamond earring is safe for the time being.
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Those Were Some Bad Ollie’ves

I ate old pizza…again.
I think my humans need more training.
Love,
Oliver
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French Bull’y’dog

This is Helga. Our dear friends (and her godparents) brought their new puppy to visit for a play date at our home. Helga was jealous and selfish over her toys and humans. She bullied and chased the puppy so badly we had to separate them all night. Also, she apparently taught the puppy how to growl angrily. We were mortified.
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You don’t need a blanket to keep you warm!

I chewed the plug off my mom’s blanket 3 times, it make me to warm at night.
I have no shame and will do it again.Ace
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Of Corso I’m Stressed!

It was stressful times. I was left to my own devices at my grandparent’s house when my mom’s grandfather was in the hospital dying. I had to eat my grandma’s tasty couch. So sorry!
Love,
Cassius
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I love to eat clothes!

I love to eat clothes, shoes and bathroom trash!
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On the plus side, I’m not a picky eater

I ate a 6 foot leash and had to have it removed by the vet. Three weeks later, I ate a shower curtain.
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