change & challenges

How I Overcame Shame from Sexual Assault and Began to Love Myself

“Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.” ~Martin Luther King Jr.
It was Saturday, August 29th, 2020, when I admitted to myself, for the very first time, that I was a victim of …
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The Two Sides of Gratitude: When It Helps Us and When It Hurts Us

“When life is sweet, say thank you and celebrate. When life is bitter, say thank you and grow.” ~Shauna Niequist
Imagine if you had a tool that, with no effort or change on your part, could cast a glow around …
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Why I Never Let Anyone Support Me Until the Day I Almost Died

“Why don’t you get up and make the coffee, while I stay in my sleeping bag and plan our ascent route?” I half-heartedly ask my climbing partner Hank.
He just looks at me with that unassuming, “give-me-a-break Val Jon” look …
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You’re Bent, Not Broken: A Mindset Shift That Can Change Your Life

“Bent but never broken; down but never out.” ~Annetta Ribken
I lived for a long time thinking I was broken beyond repair.
Let me rephrase: I thought I was unloved, unworthy, scarred, and broken. What a package, right?…
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Feeling Weighed Down by Regret? What Helps Me Let Go

“Be kind to past versions of yourself that didn’t know the things you know now.” ~Unknown
When I taught yoga classes in jails in Colorado and New Jersey, I would end class with the Metta Meditation:
May we all feel …
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How to Prevent Burnout: 15 Simple Self-Care Ideas to Help You Recharge

“It’s okay if you fall apart sometimes. Tacos fall apart, and we still love them.” ~Unknown
Do you often find yourself saying, “I just have to get through this week…” and then that turns into every week? I know I …
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4 Ways to Save Your Sanity When Life Gets Hard and Overwhelming

“You can’t stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.” ~Jon Kabat Zinn
In December of 2020, we noticed mom’s speech seemed difficult. Like she had stuffed cotton balls in her mouth, and someone was restraining her jaw from …
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How My Dad’s Advice to Let Someone Else Shine Created My Fear of Success

“Sometimes what you’re most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.” ~Robert Tew
Everyone has fears. It is not an emotion that is only for a chosen few. One’s fear may seem irrational to the …
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5 Ways to Be Productive with Chronic Illness: How I Built a Business from Bed

“The master leads by weakening their ambition and toughening their resolve.” ~Tao Te Ching
How much of productivity advice is ableist? Sure, there are lots of good ideas and concepts in there, but most of it is healthy-body-focused.
Advice like:…
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How Writing Letters to My Chronic Pain Helps Me Find Relief

Dear pain-in-my-feet:
I’m sorry we ever met. Remind me where I made your acquaintance? Oh, yes—on my February trip to Death Valley, where I assumed long days of hiking had caused a rock bruise. Instead of healing, you got worse …
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Why Belonging Is So Difficult for Survivors of Domestic Abuse

“Our sense of belonging can never be greater than our level of self-acceptance.” ~Brené Brown
Sitting there watching The Greatest Showman, with tears pouring down my face, I asked myself why does this song, in fact this whole …
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How I Healed My Low Self-Worth After Infidelity and Divorce

“It’s okay to let go of those who couldn’t love you. Those who didn’t know how to. Those who failed to even try. It’s okay to outgrow them, because that means you filled the empty space in you with self-love …
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To the Expectant Mom with a Million Questions and Worries

“Have a little faith in your ability to handle whatever’s coming down the road. Believe that you have the strength and resourcefulness required to tackle whatever challenges come your way. And know that you always have the capacity to make …
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Not Happy with Your Life? I Changed the Rules and You Can Too

“I really believe in the philosophy that you create your own universe. I’m just trying to create a good one for myself.” ~Jim Carrey
If someone had told me years ago I’d one day be serving mushroom mafalda to a …
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The Beauty in Her Baldness: Why My Mother Was Still Radiant with Cancer

“Beauty doesn’t come from physical perfection. It comes from the light in our eyes, the spark in our hearts, and the radiance we exude when we’re comfortable enough in our skin to focus less on how we look and more …
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How Our Parents Impact Us: The Childhood Wounds That Shape Our Lives

“The way we treat our children directly impacts what they believe about themselves.” ~Ariadne Brill
Growing up, I always felt odd. I often wondered what was wrong with me. I compared myself to my friends and always thought they had …
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Want to Change Your Life? Draw the “You” You Want to Be

“You are not too old and it is not too late.” ~Unknown
In less than a month, I’ll be hitting a major “milestone” birthday. I quit my full-time job six months ago, ending a twenty-plus year career in education, and …
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5 Important Life Skills I Learned in Grief After My Husband Died

“Sit with it. Sit with it. Sit with it. Sit with it. Even though you want to run. Even when it’s heavy and difficult. Even though you’re not quite sure of the way through. Healing happens by feeling.” ~Dr. Rebecca …
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Rethinking Masculinity: Why I Want More Than Bachelor Parties and Football

“Patriarchy is the expression of the immature masculine. It is the expression of Boy psychology, and, in part, the shadow—or crazy—side of masculinity. It expresses the stunted masculine, fixated at immature levels.” ~ Robert Moore & Doug Gillette
Seventy eggs, …
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Was I An Overachiever or Really Just Trying to Prove My Worth?

“I spend an insane amount of time wondering if I’m doing it right. At some point I just remind myself that I’m doing my best. That is enough.” ~Myleik Teele
Just one more client. Just one more call. Just one …
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Dear Mom and Dad, Thank You for the Years of Trauma

“When you finally learn that a person’s behavior has more to do with their own internal struggle than you, you learn grace.” ~Allison Aars
I’m writing this to say thank you for the trauma you caused me since I was …
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The Many Shades of Support: Everyone Shows Up for Us in Different Ways

“Empathy has no script. There is no right way or wrong way to do it. It’s simply listening, holding space, withholding judgment, emotionally connecting, and communicating that incredibly healing message of ‘You’re not alone.’” ~Brené Brown
What do a pregnancy …
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Better Help: Affordable Online Therapy, Anywhere in the World

**This is a sponsored post to introduce you to BetterHelp, a company I highly recommend!
I hear it all the time—”I’m feeling more depressed than ever, and nothing seems to help.”
I see it in blog comments. I read …
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How a Highly Sensitive Person Can Get Over a Breakup And Move On

“A shoutout to everyone who is trying right now… Trying to do the right thing. Trying to stay open. Trying to keep going. Trying to hold on. Trying to let go. Trying to find their flow. Trying to stay afloat. …
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The Messiness of Being Human and Why We Shouldn’t Judge Each Other

“Those who understand will never judge, and those who judge will never understand.” ~Wilson Kanadi
I’m waiting for my mother’s nurse to pick up. The hospital recording has been on a loop for twenty minutes: “Our hospital is committed to …
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